It's been just about a year since the world was turned up side down. I am feeling the ache of all the places I can't go and the people I can't see. I'm getting used to the mask believe it or not. I remember the first couple times wearing it, feeling restricted for breath and a little anxious, but now I do don't really notice that. My "bubble" and I have tried to use our imagination throughout the year to try to do things together that would distract us from all of the things that we might have otherwise done. This past weekend we all agreed to a bonfire outside in the back yard. I consider myself lucky to live n the outskirts of town with the extra room in my yard and nature surrounding me. The past three weeks to a month the temps were pretty cold but it warmed up just in time for our outdoor adventure. I made a pot of chilly in the morning thinking it would be an easy supper for our day outside. As I was getting dressed to head outside. I felt a little excited ~ I realized that today we were actually doing something normal for us. Something that we did every year as Northern Ontarians. It was familiar and natural and really didn't take any extra effort. I could go outside and push the world away. The best part... the sun was shining. I had just bought some cheap sunglasses at the general store up the road the day before anticipating this moment. Finally I left the house in my big boots and bulky snowpants and headed to the bonfire. I sat down and as I did the sun got my attention. I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes pushing my face to the sun. I felt it, it gently seeped into my skin pore by pore, until it's warmth gently covered my face, until it became a part of me. It was so peaceful and healing... and then the smell of the bonfire swam by.... it was rich and homey and thick and satisfying. I felt so relieved and safe and thankful for everything! It is in these moments that I am astounded by the healing energy that nature brings. Being outside with trees surrounding me, birds singing, the fresh air in my lungs, the sunshine soaking up my darkness and the earth moving through me is all the healing that I need. It sustains me and refreshes me, and sets me free for new beginnings ...... Note to Self ~ spend more time in your own back yard!
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